Antwerp

Business and nonbusiness have taken a hold of me this weekend. The last time I was online was the moment we got to Wannes' house on Friday eve for about five minutes, just enough time to write quick notes to people I needed to write back to.

I have now been offically gone for two weeks, the longest time I've ever departed New York since I moved away from home when I was 18. I am not lonely, I am not homesick, nor am I sad to be away. I am loving every experience handed to me, and indefinitely.

What this says about me, I'm not so sure.  I am curious, so let me be inquisitive about the world and all who encompass it. I can see everything if I want to or I can worry about how illogical this all is.

Yesterday, when I was dancing with Aurora at the Heron Festival (trance festival near Antwerp, Belgium), I asked myself, how am I doing all of this? I am dancing with my friend and meeting all of these great people, and I'm thousands of miles away from home; not to mention everyone speaking a language that is completely alien to me. Every time I am in a circle of friends I just look wide-eyed at everyone, trying to determine an idea or thesis that they are maintaining, usually falling short. Sometimes I'll hear "Macbook" or "Ben & Jerry's" then I get a subject, but reading this language seems near impossible, so we are lost in Dutch.

Nearly everyone speaks English so I can easily understand things when my own native tongue is spoken. However, such a language barrier incites misunderstandings, really simple ones actually.

I use the word annoying and such offense is taken because of blatant negativity. I met someone named Ingo who wanted my attention and he noticed my inherent honesty, perhaps that is the quality especially admired.

I appreciated it and I have enjoyed their circle, which reminds me so much of Portland, OR. Even the weather; mild, gray and rainy all year long. I miss Alnie.